It's Like The Summer of George; Except It's Winter and I'm Sans Cheese

I'm on Winter Break this week, so I've been busy living the dream, hence the lack of posts. (By living the dream, I of course mean I've been laying on the couch all day watching Price is Right and spending three hours trying to decide where I'm going to go to lunch.)
Clearly everyone at work is just as busy as I am; Antzo has been editing spelling errors out of his Evite responses and Falkow has apparently read everything on the internet because he's resorted to goading me in hopes of getting me to post something:

Why don’t you put up a blog entry, I thought you didn’t have anything to do this week. Do you think the redskins are gonna kill the giants on saturday? Or do you think they will play down to them.

Well played, Falkow. Well played. I'll bite.
Here are some various thoughts to get you through the work day, leading up to my 2006 Year in Review (coming this weekend) and Orange Bowl Preview (Tuesday).

* For a 5-10 team, I'm pretty pleased with the direction in which the Redskins are headed. Jason Campbell, in six NFL starts, looks more poised in the pocket than Eli Manning ever will (maybe that's an empty compliment though) and with an offseason of preperation for 2007, I'm confident he'll improve in the areas where he's struggled (red zone efficiency, delayed route reading, long release).
If I say anymore I'll encroach on my third annual State of the Redskins address (coming soon), but I can say I think the 'Skins will beat New York on Saturday night.
The Giants are a mess. Some players (think white moron with patriotic tattoo) are indicating they'd rather lose and end their season than make the playoffs. And nobody seems particularly inspired to save Tom Coughlin's job either.
Barring a miracle playoff run, Coughlin will doubtlessly be canned early in the off-season. The rumor-mill will be buzzing with the names Belichick and Weis, but expect the G-Men to grab a new GM first - Charley Casserly anyone - and then go for an uninspiring retread like Mike Sherman.

* The Wolfman would like me to mention that Philip Rivers is 18-53 over his last two games and if his name were instead Rex Grossman, this would be inspiring critics nationwide to ask whether Rivers can lead his team to the Super Bowl.

* Len Pasquarelli will never relinquish his title as my most despised person in the sports media; but the battle for second has been heating up of late. ESPN's Michael Smith has been the clear #2 for a while now; not because he's any dumber than, say, Sean Salisbury or Michael Irvin, but because Smith fancies himself as an intellectual, which makes his idiotic thoughts and commentary all the more ridiculous.
But now, without warning, SI.com's Andrew Perloff is making a charge on the heels of his absurd blog entry: Handicapping the NFC's Chances to Win The Super Bowl. Originally I was just going to rant about how stupid the whole post is, but there's too many moronic gems to ignore, so I'm going to post the whole thing, line-by-line to better deal with the idiocy.

I have an idea for how the NFL can deal with the obvious imbalance between the two conferences and the potential for a mediocre Super Bowl matchup. The league should extend flexible scheduling into the playoffs. Simply move two or three teams from the AFC into the NFC to even out the field.

I have an idea too. It's called give Lisa Loeb her glasses back. How does this lede even make sense? Flexible scheduling moves pre-scheduled games to later times to accomodate television. It doesn't arbitrarily switch teams into other conferences, jackass.

I would say five AFC teams -- New England, Baltimore, Cincinnati, Indianapolis and San Diego -- would be prohibitive favorites to capture the NFC if they could compete in the lesser of the two playoff pools. The Bengals would have breezed through the NFC and they can't even reach the postseason in the AFC.

Please note that the Bengals, who would have "breezed through the NFC," went 2-2 against the conference with losses to the Falcons and Bucs. The Bucs, for crap's sake.

Somebody has to come out of the NFC, but it's hard to imagine it has a good shot at winning it all. Let's handicap each of the conference's playoff contenders' shot at not just reaching the Super Bowl, but winning it.

Perloff fails to understand that because somebody has to come out of the NFC, that team will have a very good chance to, in fact, win the Super Bowl. To say the conference has no shot is insane because they'll ultimately have a 1-in-2 chance to win the title. Meaning; one NFC team will play in the Super Bowl no matter how crappy the conference is. This flawed logic is what makes Perloff's whole argument totally invalid but he fails to realize this, even as he makes a mention of it.

Bears -- 10/1: The Bears are the best the NFC has to offer and they would be middle of the pack or worse in the AFC. Their 13-2 record has a lot to do with the collection of woeful NFC teams they've faced, and quarterback Rex Grossman was no match for three of the four AFC defenses he faced this season.

The Bears beat the Jets, a presumptive AFC playoff team, on the road. True, they did play woefully against the Pats, but New England didn't play much better. Perloff does have a point that Grossman didn't play well against three of the four AFC teams, but that belies the fact that it's the Bears defense, not Grossman, that will lead Chicago in the playoffs. If Grossman is simply adequate, the Bears have a great chance of winning against any AFC contender. To give them 10/1 odds to win one game against a team like San Diego is a bet anybody would take. Let's put it this way, if I offered Perloff $1,000 on that bet, there's no shot in hell he'd ever even consider it.

Saints -- 15/1: I've said all season that the Saints are overrated. And they've made me look like an idiot for most of the year. Too late to go back now. New Orleans is 1-3 against the AFC and will be severely outmanned if it reaches the Big Game.

In your defense, Andrew, it's probably not very hard to make you look like an idiot. The Saints, by the way, are currently receiving 5/1 odds to win the Super Bowl in Las Vegas. See what I mean? So easy!

Eagles -- 20/1: It's not pretty to imagine how the NFL's 26th-ranked rushing defense would hold up against an AFC powerhouse.

Mere lines after proclaiming the Colts as one of the favorites to beat any NFC team, Perloff writes that the Eagles rush defense hinders any title hopes they might have. I'd say the irony is likely lost on Perloff, but since he's probably a huge Alanis Morissette fan, maybe it's not.

Giants -- 100/1: For pure comedy purposes, this is the team everyone has to be rooting for. Hey, the Cardinals overcame a late slump to win the World Series. Maybe the Giants can come out of their nosedive if they make the postseason.

Isn't the Cardinals World Series win an indication that any team can get hot at the right time and win a title, a la Pittsburgh last season?
Things got a little better by the end of the column, so I didn't include Perloff's unfunny rips of Brett Favre and the Falcons. I will give Perloff credit for allowing comments after his posts (most of which are rips). He might be a moron, but at least he's not spineless like Bill Simmons (who wrote a very-similar piece about the National League this September. Oops.)

* Speaking of Michael Smith, he was busy over at ESPN.com making some baffling statements of his own. He opens:

Another memorable regular season is nearing its end.

What, exactly, has been so memorable about this season? Hasn't this been one of the most boring regular seasons in recent memory?

By the close of business Sunday, there could be a record six running backs with 2,000 yards from scrimmage. Quarterbacks may be the game's marquee position but, if the regular season was any indication, running backs will be behind the wheel on their teams' drive to the Super Bowl.

Quick, name the last great RB to win a Super Bowl. You have to go back to 2000 when an underutilized Marshall Faulk won one with the Rams. Defenses win Championships, Michael.

The thing everyone must remember is that whether or not Schottenheimer and Dungy/Manning get the monkeys off their backs, they're still great at what they do, among the best ever.

Peyton Manning might be among the best quarterbacks ever, no matter whether he hoists a Lombardi trophy or not. But without a Super Bowl win, Marty Schottenheimer won't even crack the top-20 list of best coaches. And Tony Dungy... Are you high? Tony Dungy is one of the best coaches ever? Did Andrew Perloff ghostwrite this column?

4. The AFC Championship Game: Because the AFC has been the superior conference this season, its title game will be billed the unofficial Super Bowl. The winner will be favored to win the whole thing. For sure, whoever survives the AFC's playoff field will have earned it. The Chargers and Ravens have been considered the league's best teams pretty much all season. If they meet for the Lamar Hunt Trophy, it might be the most highly anticipated semifinal since the Cowboys-Niners-Packers NFC showdowns of the mid-1990s.

Oh lord. So many things wrong with this paragraph. First of all, let's stop acting like the gap between the AFC and NFC has more to do with the AFC being great rather than the NFC sucking. Just because the NFC is full of mediocre teams doesn't make the AFC awesome. I mean, the freakin' Ravens are going to earn a bye. Can you remember even being less impressed with a 12-3 team in your life? Does the thought of playing Baltimore scare anybody besides Atlanta nightclub frequenters?
Every single AFC contender is greatly flawed and the parity among them only proves this point. Hell, the Colts are still considered dangerous and the worst Patriots team of this decade somehow has an 11-4 record. The AFC is better, to be sure, but they're far from great.
As for the Chargers and Ravens being considered the league's best all season... In ESPN.com's October 24th Power Rankings, the Chargers were rated 8th (behind the Giants and Bengals) and those worldbeating Ravens were #13 (behind Atlanta, Carolina, Seattle and Minnesota.)
And then we have the capper, which is worth repeating: "If [San Diego and Baltimore] meet for the Lamar Hunt Trophy, it might be the most highly anticipated semifinal since the Cowboys-Niners-Packers NFC showdowns of the mid-1990s." That line makes Andrew Perloff sound like Grantland Rice. Does Michael Smith actually believe this? I... It's... I can't even begin to fathom how this line could make it past an editor. I have to move on.

* In the requisite pre-game conference call with out-of-town writers, Michael Vick neatly summed up why he'll never be anything more than a glorified running back on a mediocre team. Vick said:

I rushed for (over) 1,000 yards this year. I threw a career-high 19 touchdowns, still one game to go. I've accomplished a lot of things. I think I've played consistently week in and week out. I can't say what more I could've done. What I can say is that I feel good about what I've accomplished this season.

I'm looked at in a totally different echelon than everybody else. Even though we all great. I don't see commentators and reporters saying certain things about quarterbacks that they say about me when they're making mistakes. It's like I'm the worst person in the world when I throw an interception. Other guys go out and throw four or five interceptions in a game, and it's all good. Nobody talks about it. I throw one and I'm not doing my job. It's tough, but I don't even care.

Is Vick delusional or just a narcisissitic imbecile? He feels good about his season even though his team will likely miss the playoffs for the second straight season? He thinks he's the only #1 pick getting ripped? Does he not hear what people having been saying about David Carr and Eli Manning all season?
After all this, maybe Jim Mora wasn't joking about dropping everything if that Washington job opened up.

* Chargers GM A.J. Smith isn't shy about his disdian for the Manning family, as evidenced by this amusing Washington Post piece about Eli's infamous refusal to play in San Diego. Smith is probably a huge dick, but he's alright with me. Read the whole thing.

* Because I'm bored and you're bored, here are some lists of things I enjoyed in 2006. (Keep in mind, I'm only listing things I've seen or heard. If you have any recommendations, please drop a note in the comments section.)

Movies
The Departed
Inside Man
Dreamgirls
Wordplay
The Devil Wears Prada
Cars

Albums
"Modern Times" - Bob Dylan
"Hell Hath No Fury" - Clipse

Songs
"Nettie Moore" - Bob Dylan
"Black Republicans" - Nas & Jay-Z
"My Love" & "What Goes Around Comes Around" - Justin Timberlake
"SOS" - Rihanna
"Maneater (Remix)" - Nelly Furtado & Lil' Wayne
"Steady As She Goes" - The Raconteurs
"Rain" - Chamillionaire
"Blow" - Rick Ross

Books
The Blind Side - Michael Lewis
The Looming Tower: Al-Qaeda and the Road to 9/11 - Lawrence Wright
The Bob Dylan Encyclopedia - Michael Gray

TV Shows
Pardon the Interruption
House
NFL Network's NFL Replay
Entourage

I'll post my week 17 picks tomorrow. Check back later this weekend for the 2006 Year in Review. I sincerely hope I was able to aid in your procrasination today.

NFL Picks: Week 16
Christmas Edition

'Twas the day before Christmas
and temps have been dropping,
let's get on with the picks
'cause I need to go shopping.

Tampa and Cleveland
play a game near the lake,
let's go with Tampa,
but who cares, for crap's sake?

The Titans and Bills
have slim playoff hopes,
Pius the Second
is my most favorite Pope.

Vince wins that game
and P. Rivers wins his,
an underrated song
is The Firm's hit "Firm Biz".

Oh, Michael. Oh, Vick.
What disease will you toss,
some lucky young lady
after your team gets the loss?

The Ravens will lose
if they hurt themself,
or if Ray Lewis
should murder an elf.

For Christmas this year,
Eli asked for a doll,
and to play better
than Robert Duvall.

His Giants lose,
as do Tom Brady's Pats,
the Texans from Houston
and those felonious 'Cats.

And finally the Redskins
will win yet aga-ain.
I just cut my tongue
on a sharp candy cane.

Friends, I won't lie,
I mailed this rhyme in.
I'm tired and cranky
and ran out of gin.

So have a great Christmas,
or whatever you fancy.
I'll see you next year,
Derek Jeter's a nancy.

Can They Still Get Paulus For Impersonating A Point Guard?

It's becoming quite clear the only criminals involved in the Duke lacrosse case are the accuser and the prosecutor who pursued a dead-end case without a single shred of credible evidence. The only question now is when District Attorney Mike Nifong will be disbarred and how many charges will be brought against him.

2006/2007 Bowl Preview Soiree

For the second consecutive year, I'm running a Bowl Confidence Pool to liven up the college postseason. To most, Rice vs. Troy sounds like Konami's failed attempt to make an NFL-version of their famed "Jordan vs. Bird" Nintendo game, but to somebody who took Rice for 32; why it's quite possibly the biggest game of the year. The lesson, as always: Gambling makes things more fun.
I always do pretty well in these things; last year I won my inagural pool and the year before my dad and I finished 9th out of 120. Considering I watch little college football, this has always surprised me. But then when I think of how miserable I am at NCAA Tournament pools despite watching college basketball nonstop from November to March, I guess it makes sense. I rarely do research while filling out my brackets because of all the preconceived notions I've developed for each team. For the confidence pool, however, I have my print-outs of the Vegas lines, each team's schedules and stat sheets and a plethora of expert opinions from across the internet. Maybe I should not watch any basketball this season and see if it helps come March.
Anyway, with the bowl season kicking off tonight when TCU and Northern Illinois meet in the fabled Poinsettia Bowl, here are my picks and confidence number for each game.

Poinsettia – 12/19
TCU vs. Northern Illinois
I'm going all-in on the first hand of the tournament. My buddy Antzo did this once and, predictably, busted out. He lasted a full 17 seconds. And, no. I'll resist making the obvious joke.
Pick: TCU (32)

Pioneer – 12/21
BYU vs. Oregon
When in doubt, go with the Mormons... And the team whose uniforms don't burn a hole through your retina.
Pick: BYU (4)

New Orleans – 12/22
Rice vs. Troy
Mono-syllabic colleges of the world, rejoice!
Pick: Rice (11)

Papa Johns – 12/23
South Florida vs. East Carolina
You know how during bowl games there is always the awkward, requisite chat with the CEO of the title sponser? I think I'm going to be pretty disappointed if, during this game, Holly Rowe is interviewing anyone other than Papa John himself.
Pick: South Florida (12)

New Mexico – 12/23
New Mexico vs. San Jose St.
I had a fairly good joke about the Spartans playing the Aztecs and how Mel Gibson - well, you kind of had to be there. But then I remembered that New Mexico's mascot is the Lobo and New Mexico State's is the Aggie, not the Aztec, so I really don't know where I was going with the whole thing.
Pick: San Jose St. (3)

Armed Forces – 12/23
Tulsa vs. Utah
Remember when Utah was the toast of college football and playing in a BCS Bowl just two years ago? Now they're playing Tulsa in a ridiculously-named game and making me fret for ten minutes before picking them and assigning a whopping confidence level of 2.
Pick: Utah (2)

Hawaii – 12/24
Arizona State vs. Hawaii
Playing Hawaii at Hawaii is sort of like playing tennis with Hef at the Playboy Mansion. Even though you might be a superior player, the distractions are too big to mount. And now that I've gotten my triple-entendre out of the way, let's move on.Pick: Hawaii (23)

Motor City – 12/26
Mid. Tennessee. vs. Cent. Mich.
Nothing says college football like a match-up in Detroit between two vaguely-median-directional-named schools.
Pick: Central Michigan (31)

Emerald – 12/27
Florida State vs. UCLA
FSU mailed it in weeks ago. Luckily for them, though, Adrian McPherson mugged the mailman.
Pick: UCLA (21)

Independence – 12/28
Oklahoma State vs. Alabama
I'd be slightly more excited about this one if it were a basketball game. Slightly.
Pick: Oklahoma State (8)

Holiday – 12/28
California vs. Texas A&M
I seem to remember drunkenly watching Army nearly upset Texas A&M a few months ago. This was either a very strange dream or all the evidence I need to pick against the Aggies.
Pick: California (13)

Texas – 12/28
Rutgers vs. Kansas State
Rutgers coach Greg Schiano has done a marvelous job in turning the Scarlet Knights into a force in the Big East conference. He was rewarded for this with the Home Depot National Coach of the Year Award. Not nominated was Wake Forest coach Jim Grobe. Not only was Grobe's lack of nomination a travesty; but it would have been absurd if Grobe wasn't a unanimous choice to win!
Schiano brought Rutgers back last year, when they finished 7-4 and earned a berth in the Insight.com Bowl. This year, Rutgers was 4th in the Big East preseason poll, which was nearly accurate - they finished 3rd. On the other hand, Wake Forest hadn't been to a bowl since 2003, went 4-7 in 2005 and was picked last in their division in the ACC Preseason poll. Nobody, and I mean nobody, expected Wake Forest to finish with 11 wins and the ACC Title. Their storybook season is easily the biggest surprise in college football since Northwestern went to the Rose Bowl in 1996.
With Rutgers, there were hints that they'd be a solid team this year. With Wake, there were none. Factor in the fact that the team's starting QB and RB went down in early September and Grobe should have won in a landslide. This it to take nothing away from Schiano, but Jim Grobe was clearly the best coach in college football this year. (No joke; as I was typing this I received a text from my cousin that said "grobe ap coach of year". So maybe I'll just shut up.)
Pick: Rutgers (24)

Music City – 12/29
Clemson vs. Kentucky
Hillbillies of the world, unite!
Pick: Clemson (26)

Sun - 12/29
Oregon State vs. Missouri
If Abe Simpson refuses to recognize Missouri then, dammit, so do I.
Pick: Oregon State (7)

Liberty – 12/29
Houston vs. South Carolina
When Steve Spurrier was coaching the Redskins, he actually earned a win against the NFL team from Houston. I know, I was amazed too.
Pick: South Carolina (22)

Insight – 12/29
Texas Tech vs. Minnesota
Do you think Rocky Balboa is getting good reviews because everyone's expectations were so low, so when the movie didn't totally suck, they were thrilled and now believe it to be better than it actually was? Because that's kind of what I'm thinking.
Pick: Texas Tech (25)

Champs Sports – 12/29
Purdue vs. Maryland
Only one person in my pool picked Purdue to win this game, and it's the guy who grew up rooting for the Terps and watched more of their games this season than anyone else in the pool (me). Translation: Bet the farm on the Terps.
Pick: Purdue (10)

Meineke – 12/30
Navy vs. Boston College
I have two rules for the Christmas season: 1) In a bowl, never pick the team whose coach just made a lateral move to an intra-conference school. 2) Always rewind that Victoria's Secret commercial with Heidi Klum dressed as a sexy Santa Claus at least thrice.
Pick: Navy (5)

Alamo – 12/30
Texas vs. Iowa
Was anyone else thrilled to hear that former Hawkeye Merton Hanks currently works as a uniform inspector for the NFL? Apparently he mills about on the field before the game and makes players change their shoes or socks or wristbands if those items don't jibe with NFL regulations. Frankly, Roger Goodell couldn't have a better man for the job, as Merton has extensive experience in fashion accrued from years of shopping at 'Big and Really Tall Neck' stores.
Pick: Texas (28)

Peach – 12/30
Georgia vs. Virginia Tech
Antzo went to VT and our buddy Klinny went to Georgia. I'm holding out hope that by the end of this game, we'll have a situation like this.
Pick: Virginia Tech (18)

MPC Computers – 12/31
Miami vs. Nevada
Let's hope Boise's leaders don't make light of the fact that
Pick: Miami (15)

Outback – 1/1
Tennessee vs. Penn State
They closed the only Outback near where I live, so watching this game will likely be torturous, knowing that I may never taste the salty, fried goodness that is a Bloomin' Onion ever again.
Pick: Tennessee (19)

Cotton – 1/1
Auburn vs. Nebraska
Up until this year, The Cotton Bowl was the only bowl game on FOX. I remember waking up hungover on New Year's Day and stumbling downstairs only to discover that Ron Pitts was the commentator for a game that was half-over and looked visually awful, as all FOX football broadcasts do. Sadly, the four of the five BCS games are on the network this year, so we're stuck with miserable 720p for the miserable "title game" that takes place a miserable seven days after the freakin' ball drops in Times Square. Way to go, NCAA! You make Gary Bettman look like Pete Rozelle.
Pick: Auburn (6)

Gator – 1/1
West Virginia vs. Georgia Tech
On paper this game seems interesting, but I imagine I'll be watching a Real World marathon instead.
Pick: West Virginia (20)

Capital One – 1/1
Arkansas vs. Wisconsin
This has the trappings of a great one, which usually means that it'll be a blowout by the team I picked against.
Pick: Arkansas (1)

Rose Bowl
USC vs. Michigan
At least one bowl can keep up the appearance of tradition.
Pick: Michigan (16)

Fiesta Bowl
Boise State vs. Oklahoma
Two people in my pool actually picked Boise State to upset Oklahoma. But, since they were the only two to pick Northern Illinois last night, I'm thinking I shouldn't be too concerned about picking the Sooners big.
Pick: Oklahoma (30)

Orange
Wake Forest vs. Louisville
I've been picking against Wake all year. Why stop now? (A more comprehensive game preview will follow next week.)
Pick: Louisville (9)

Sugar
Notre Dame vs. LSU
We are nothing without our traditions. A few of my holiday favorites are the Christmas Eve party at my parent's house, eating my aunt's delicious cookies on Christmas Day and The Wolfman picking whoever Notre Dame is playing for the most points.
Pick: LSU (29)

Inernational – 1/6
Cincinnati vs. Western Michigan
GMAC – 1/7
Ohio vs. Southern Miss
I can take the Bowl Coalition. I can take the corporate sponserships for each game. I can take the BCS, The Harris Interactive Poll and lame excuses against a playoff. Hell, I can even take the bastardizaton of New Year's Day bowl games. But what I cannot excuse are two mediocre bowls taking placing after January 1 and after the Rose, Orange, Cotton, Sugar and Fiesta Bowls. This is a travesty. Is nothing sacred?
Picks: Cincinatti (14), Southern Miss (17)

BCS Championship – 1/8
Florida vs. Ohio State
Last year I won my pool because I picked Texas to beat USC, even though I thought at the time USC was probably going to win. I tried to stick with that plan again this season but since I can't even fathom Florida keeping this game close, I took OSU for big points and hitched my fortune to Central Michigan and Purdue. I'm so screwed.
Pick: Ohio State (27)

Didn't get a chance to finish my bowl preview, so I'll be posting it sometime tomorrow (Wednesday) morning.

Monday Afternoon Cornerback

* With solid performances in their last four games, Joe Gibbs and the Washington Redskins are making a case to keep the team in tact for 2007 and avoiding the usual off-season overhaul of which Dan Snyder is quite fond.
Jason Campbell and the offense are playing well, running the ball with ease and efficicently spreading the ball in the passing game. Al Saunders' unit needs to perform better in the red zone, but that's a problem that will likely get solved as Campbell becomes more familiar with the offense.
Defensively, Gregg Williams' secondary has tightened considerably and his exotic blitz packages are finally putting some pressure on opposing quarterbacks.
Even the play of the special teams has improved. Shaun Suisham looks automatic from within 40 and Derrick Frost has managed to up his net average a bit in recent weeks.
With a road game at St. Louis on Christmas Eve and a primetime showdown at home against the Giants, the 'Skins could finish the year at 7-9 and with considerable momentum heading into an off-season that could (and should) be, blissfully, quiet.

* Isn't it great how the Saints can go from being prohibitive favorites in the NFC one moment and a big question mark the next? After destroying the Cowboys on national TV last Sunday, the Saints were suddenly cast as the frontrunners in the very-mediocre NFC. With Rex Grossman struggling and the Bears defense confronting injuries and Tank Johnson's Steven Jackson-impersonation, it was thought that the Saints would be the conference's Super Bowl representative.
Yet, after a poor outing against the Redskins, the word most attached to the Saints wasn't "favorite" but "fluke". And this is yet another reason why the oversaturation of NFL coverage is one day going to make me start watching Growing Pains reruns instead of Sportscenter.
Is anybody really that surprised that New Orleans laid an egg against the Redskins? They were so geared up for that Cowboys game and ended up playing their best game of the season. A let-down was pratically guaranteed against a Redskins team that has struggled all season. New Orleans knew they had the NFC South wrapped-up and, with their tiebreaker hold over Dallas, would control their own playoff bye destiny even with a loss.
This is not to say that the Saints tanked the game or wanted to lose, but it's only natural that they came out sluggish after such a big win. There's no need to write-off the Saints because of one poor offensive outing the same way there's no need to write-off the Bears because of one poor defensive effort. Those two teams are still the favorites in the NFC, no matter what Mike Golic thinks about Philadelphia. (This morning on "Mike and Mike" that doofus said Philly is the new favorite because of their win over the Giants.)

* Speaking of the Giants; they're done. Maybe not from playoff contention, but from Super Bowl contention. Their run defense is Colt-like, Eli still looks like he's trying as hard as Eugene Levy is those straight-to-DVD American Pie flicks and it seems that Tom Coughlin has, once and for all, lost the team.
Because the NFC is so terrible, the Giants might stumble into the second Wild Card berth; but that could prove exceedingly difficult with New Orleans visiting the Meadowlands next weekend and a trip to Washington on December 30.

* My college roommate Falkow forwarded me this message he received from a co-worker this afternoon:

This has to be my new wallpaper. His freaking eyes are closed. Greg, send this to your Eli hating Redskin fan friend. Man, this is classic.

* If the Colts fail to advance to the AFC Championship this season, Tony Dungy should be fired. It's preposterous that two of the premiere offensive players of this generation have advanced to only one conference title game in the past four seasons despite a 48-16 overall record. At some point, doesn't Colts ownership have to realize that Dungy seems to have taken this team as far as he can take them? It's not like he's experiencing playoff failure with a scrappy bunch of underachievers (as Bill Cowher had, prior to last season). Dungy's Colts have had the most talent of any NFL team for the past three seasons and all they have to show for it is one AFC title game appearance.
Maybe it's not Dungy's fault the defense is so terrible. And maybe it isn't his fault that his sublime offense has put up 0, 14, 3 and 18 points in their four playoff defeats. But somebody has to take responsibility. With Peyton Manning's prime slowly fading away, the Colts might not have too many more shots to contend for a Super Bowl win. If they fail to this season, Dungy shouldn't be around for the next one.

* Between sickness, finals and the arrival of my nine-month old niece into town, I've kept a pretty light posting schedule recently. That should stay the same throughout Christmas, but keep checking back, as I'll be posting shorter entries each day and will resume my NFL picks this Friday.

Thursday Thoughts

* The Red Sox and Japanese pitcher Daisuke Matsuzaka agreed to a six-year, $52 million deal this afternoon, just hours before a Thursday-night deadline would have ended the team's negotiating rights. The big news is that Matsuzaka's addition makes the Red Sox the new favorites in the A.L. The bigger news is that Scott Boras got beat. Badly.
Yesterday afternoon I was talking with a Sox fan who had already resigned himself to the fact that John Henry and Theo Epstein had bid the $51.1 million with no intention of signing the Japanese ace. At the time, it made sense. Henry was already on the defensive, placing blame on Boras and Epstein was making cryptic statements about how the $50 million was built into Matsuzaka's price. (Which - not really, Theo. Matsuzaka isn't seeing that $50 million - it goes to his former team, the Seibu Lions - so that money is irrelevant to him. It's like paying a cover to get into a club and expecting that $20 to go towards the bar tab. That's not the way it works. Theo paid the money to get in the door. Once he got in, that money should have been considered gone.) Maybe the Sox were just putting out a dog-and-pony show designed to divert attention away from the fact that they put in a phony bid just to keep Matsuzaka off the Yankees. And perhaps they would have done that if Boras had kept up his posturing. But he caved and the Sox were smart to agree to a deal. Who knows what they would have done if Boras had maintained his $100 million stance. I guess it doesn't matter now though.
From all reports, every single party involved in the negotiations (the Lions, the Red Sox and Matsuzaka) wanted the deal to happen, which left Boras with no bargaining power. I'm sure Boras will put his spin on the deal, claiming victory, but I'm guessing he would have left the negotiations if he had had his druthers. Remember, this is a guy who let J.D. Drew, Jered Weaver and J.D's brother Stephen sit out rather than sign contracts he didn't think were fair. I haven't read anything about it yet, but I'd wager that Matsuzaka and the Lions forced the deal.
Reports out of Boston this morning said the two sides were $3 million per year apart. Boras wanted $11 million per over six years, the Sox were holding fast at $8 million. The reported contract is for six years, $52 million. That's $8.66 million per season. Looks like Boras lost.
So did Sox fans though.
The Matsuzaka signing is a good baseball, and business, move for the team. But the signing of a Japanese superstar is yet another sign that Sox fans, who bemoaned the Evil Empire of George Steinbrenner, are now rooting for a team that operates exactly as the Yankees do. I'm guessing that irony will likely be lost in translation.

* Longtime Expo/National Jose Vidro was traded tonight to the Seattle Mariners for two prospects. I haven't had a chance to look at the stats of said prospects, but I imagine they're probably B-level talent, considering Vidro is an oft-injured, highly-paid middle-infielder.
The trade makes sense, but I'm not gonna lie: I left a long, rambling, fury-filled message about it for my cousin George after he texted me the news tonight. When I wasn't ranting about Jim Bowden, here were some of my more salient points:

• This trade means the team is building for the future, which is great. But if that's the case, why didn't they deal Soriano at the trade deadline and get some young talent in return???!!! It makes no sense. The Nats' front office wants a young team to build around, a la the Tigers and Marlins, so that in 2010, they can have a contending team. That's great. I'm all for rebuilding. But the most valuable tool in that process was Soriano and they frittered away his rights for a couple of crappy draft picks. It's sort of like a person vowing to become environmentally friendly by putting in solar panels, recycling everything and conserving energy while, at the same time, still driving around in a Hummer H3.
• Vidro was set to earn $16 million over the next two seasons, which is why this deal is a sound baseball move no matter how little shot the prospects have at making in the bigs. However, unless the team is planning on pouring that $8 million per season back into the roster, this is an awfully arrogant move by an ownership team that hasn't yet earned the right for such bravado.
  I'm not saying the Nats should go out and pay $55 million for Gil Meche, but they need to throw some cash (like, say $5 million) at a middle-of-the-road pitcher like they did with Esteban Loaiza two seasons ago just to show that they still want to field a decent ballclub while planning for the future. This doesn't appear to be the plan though. Essentially, the Nats are giving up on 2007 and building for 2008, when a new, waterfront stadium is set to open. The problem with this is, with a new team in a new market, the ownership owes it to fans to put a decent product out on the field. By saying that 2007 is going to be a wash, the Lerner family is practically daring fans to cancel their season tickets, knowing full-well that few will because '07 ticket holders get first crack at the good seats in the new ballpark. This is why the Vidro thing bothers me so much. Baseball needs to be nurtured in D.C. There's no shortage of things to do around here in the summer and if the Nats are fielding a lousy team, the seats will be empty.
  Without building goodwill around the city and without getting top prospects that will play down the road, the Nats could be headed towards the situation the exists in Pittsburgh and Cincinatti, where they have brand new stadiums that are empty on game-nights because the teams are terrible. D.C. has lost baseball twice. This new stadium assures the Nats will be here for a while. Whether or not the Lerners and Jim Bowden want anybody to see them while they're here remains to be seen.
  

* Five weeks ago, various experts thought the New York Giants were the best team in the NFC. With a 6-2 record, they figured, the Giants were in good position to fight for homefield advantage throughout the playoffs.
When four consecutive losses followed, including a shocking collapse against Vince Young and the Titans and a last-second heartbreaker at home to Dallas, the Giants were thought to be done. They were 6-6 with an erratic, disenchanted quarterback. Players were bickering, coaches were getting disrespected and the Gotham tabloids were having a field day. Even Peter King, who in his off-time serves as the Manning Family PR man, was ripping young, overrated Elisha. As of Sunday morning, just four days ago, the Giants were mired in the muck that is mediocrity.
Yet, after a win over a Carolina team that had recently lost to the lowly Redskins and started CHRIS FRIGGIN' WEINKE at quarterback, the Giants were all of a sudden in the driver's seat for a playoff berth. Peter King even wrote, "But the Giants... do just enough things well that you think maybe they can shock the world too." (He's talking about winning the Super Bowl, by the way.)
Now, I'm not here to say the Giants aren't going to win the Super Bowl. I mean, they're not going to win the Super Bowl because Eli is a lower-tier quarterback and their defense is too susceptible to the run, but that's not the point. My point is, the media is much too quick to canonize quarterbacks (Tony Romo), join a playoff bandwagon (St. Louis Rams) or close the door on teams (the Giants this year and Pittsburgh and Washington last season). It's the inevitable byproduct of the 24-hour news cycle that begs for stories all week when, in reality, the only new news comes out on Sunday. ESPN has to fill their air-time though, so we're forced to listen to morons like Sean Salisbury make gross generalizations about a team's season based on the last 60 minutes of football they played.
The Steelers were 7-5 last season and on the verge of missing the playoffs before they got hot. Joe Gibbs and the Redskins were 5-6 and left for dead in the NFC yet came within a Carlos Rogers interception-drop of advancing to the NFC Championship Game.
For some reason, everybody buys into this and sees each game as a must-win. The season is 16 games long. Playoff positioning changes every Sunday. A team that looks strong this week might appear to be in dire straits the next.
That's the way football is. It's a 16-week dog-fight. Or, in Eli Manning's case, a 16-week cat-fight. But you get the picture.

This Never Would Have Happened To Brady Quinn

Fear not, my friends; for the skies are still safe from terror. Today, the ever-vigilant Transportation Security Administration refused to let Ohio State quarterback Troy Smith bring his Heisman Trophy aboard a plane.
In other news, the Virginia Tech football team will have to take a bus to the Chick-fil-A bowl since 79% of its roster is on the TSA's "no-fly" list.
I'm battling a cold and finishing up (or, to be more accurate, just starting) my final project for one of my classes, so posting will be light for the next few days.

Sometimes A Picture Is Worth 1,000 Words. Or Streisand Albums.

Duke players Josh McRoberts, David McClure and DeMarcus Nelson celebrate during Blue Devils win over George Mason.

Week 13 Picks: Atlanta, Miami, Kansas City, Jacksonville, Tennessee, Detroit, Washington, Cincinnati, New York Giants, Green Bay, Arizona, Denver, New York Jets, Dallas

Well, He Does Know A Lot About Mediocrity

From an article in today's Washington Post about the big bucks Major League Baseball teams are throwing at average players:

"I'm surprised at the stultified dollars that have been spent on mediocre players," said Jim Bowden, general manager of the Washington Nationals, speaking in general about the market. "It's just amazing to me, because even with the revenues being as high as ever in the game, there's not enough to support the type of signings that are being done."

This from the man who spent $16 million on Cristian Guzman.
Another gem in today's sports page came in a piece about the absurd Harris Interactive Poll. Adam Kilgore unintentionally (or maybe intentionally) dumps on a former NFL quarterback and respected analyst:

Trying to come up with a broad scope of opinion, the Harris Interactive poll utilizes 114 voters, among them an ice cream company executive, a former college president and Boomer Esiason.

That's gold, Jerry. Gold.
Picks tomorrow.

Lynx, But Not The Minnesota Kind

My buddy Ank and I were considering watching Rocky III last night, as Comcast is now offering all four of Stallone's boxing epics on their free HD In Demand channel. (There's no need to point out that there are actually five Rocky movies because it'll be a cold day in hell before I recognize Rocky V - or Missour-ah, for that matter.)
We ended up going with The Usual Suspects instead, but I couldn't help but think this morning that III would have been a better choice. As I drove to my doctor I couldn't stop thinking of Clubber Lang's pre-fight prediction of "pain" since that's what usually happens to me after visiting this particular doc. Not that it's a bad thing, of course, since the doctor always says "you gotta make pain to break pain." (OK, he never says that, but you get the idea.) Long story short, he popped one of my back joints into its correct position and now I can barely move. This made waiting at CVS to get my prescriptions filled for 55 minutes even more fun than usual.
In lieu of a post for the afternoon, here are some things that have been helping me procrastinate from doing actual work over the past few days. Enjoy. I'm off to pop some pills and watch all the old Iron Chef reruns I have on my DVR:

* Jemele Hill replaced Jason Whitlock at ESPN.com's Page 2 and, quite surprisingly, she seems to be pretty good. In her third piece for the site, Hill, a black woman, takes Chiefs RB Larry Johnson for an idiotic use of the dreaded "race card".

* It might just be because I really, really love me some Tom Selleck, but these AT&T commercials from 1993 that attempted to predict the future are pretty interesting to watch now. (via Andrew Sullivan)

* Seth Mnookin also can't believe Gary Matthews will be getting $10 million in 2011.

* A New Yorker story on Walt Disney. It's long, but worth the read if you're at all interested in the American film legend.

* If you read Deadspin, you've doubtlessly know the story of Ned, the FIU player who took part in the brawl with Miami while on crutches. This post is from last month, but it continues to crack me up even after looking at it a dozen times, or so. It's probably, nay - definitely - because the guy's last name is "Ned," but it also could be because Ned brings me back to a simpler time, when the most enjoyment I derived from an on-field incident was when the dude in the wheelchair rushed the court after Georgetown beat Duke.

* This video almost makes me want to root for Louisville:

A Quick Tuesday Ten

1) I'm through with Al Saunders. Hopefully Joe Gibbs is too. Nobody's brought down a legend this quickly since Yoko Ono.
2) It might never fully dawn on me that Wake Forest won the ACC and will play in the Orange Bowl.
3) Maybe it's unfair to make the comparison, but through three starts Jason Campbell is about 5% of the quarterback that Tony Romo was through the same time period.
4) Jim Bowden's refusal to deal Alfonso Soriano at the trade deadline has been the most under-criticized sports move of the year.
5) Playing the ACC Championship in Jacksonville is sort of like holding a NASCAR race on Staten Island.
6) J.D. Drew for $14 million per season? All I can say is that if Manny Ramirez gets dealt now, Theo's been hanging with Jim Bowden too much.
7) Michigan got hosed.
8) Still, I'm looking forward to the Rose Bowl match-up and Florida's inevitable 66-17 loss to Ohio State.
9) Sometimes you don't know how you'll feel about something until it happens. This occurred with the Michigan/Florida controversy. Sunday morning I was unsure about which team I thought was deserving. After hearing about Florida jumping Michigan to reach #2, though, I realized how absurd it is that voters for some new "interactive" poll and coaches who don't watch any games are deciding who plays for the national championship. Under the same lines, I have no clue whether Lovie Smith should bench Rex Grossman for Brian Griese. Although I have a feeling if he did, I'd probably say he should have stuck with Rex.
10) My fantasy team didn't make the playoffs (for the first time in history), the Redskins are terrible and my back feels like Eli Manning's psyche. I sort of feel like Alexander when he had his terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. But at least I can always look at this picture and feel alright:

ORANGE BOWL BOUND!

Wake Forest Demon Deacons
2006 ACC Champions

Wake Forest Is Playing For The ACC Championship. In Football.

Tomorrow, Jim Grobe's Wake Forest Demon Deacons will play the biggest football game in the school's history. And this is no frivolous, unsubstantiated statement either. Other than a win over #4 Tennessee in 1946 and an upset of Georgia Tech in 1999, there aren't any other games that can possibly lay claim to the title. Even 1970, the last (and only) time the Deacs won an ACC Championship, had no big games to speak of.
Playing for the ACC Title on national television in a heavily-hyped game for the chance to go to the Orange Bowl is as big as it gets for Wake Forest. It's an occasion that isn't likely to happen again any time soon, and should be savored by all Deac fans.
To demonstrate just how unlikely today's Championship game appearance is for Wake Forest, consider the following:

- The Deacs won three more games this seaon than Jim Caldwell did in his first four years in Winston-Salem combined.
- Wake Forest has played in the postseason just six times during its 104 years of football.
- The team has won just 28% of its ACC games.
- In the year Wake won its only ACC Championship, 1970, the Deacs finished 5-1 in the conference and 1-4 out of it.
- Only one Wake Forest player has ever been named a consensus All-Ameriacan, defensive end Bill Armstrong in 1976. Not even Brian Piccolo (of Brian's Song fame) earned that honor (although he was an AP All-American and appeared on Bob Hope's Christmas Special.
- From 1993 to 1999 no Wake Forest player was selected in the NFL Draft.
- Since 1951, the Deacs have been ranked in the AP Poll for a total nine weeks. This year, they've made seven appearances.
- Wake's first national television apperance came in 1992.

It shouldn't come as a surprise, then, that the football atmosphere at Wake Forest was a bit lacking. Gamedays were an excuse to drink outside (not that one ever needs an excuse) and eat Church's Chicken, but the game was always secondary to the tailgates (which were pretty lame as well).
While I can rattle off a dozen great basketball moments that have taken place since I set foot in Winston-Salem way back in the last century (1999, to be exact), my football memories are a little less vivid. My top five Wake Forest football memories:

5) I visited my friend Nina at East Carolina and took in the Deacs/Pirates 2001 opener. During the tailgate I earned at least 15 chants of "Wake is fake, Duke is puke" because of my Wake Forest t-shirt. The chant was so lame I was unable to develop a comeback, even as Wake pummeled the undermanned Pirates. (In a stunning coincidence, an Elon grad jokingly said that very thing to me last night at a bar, suggesting that lame chants aren't exclusive to residents of Greenville.
4) My parents came down to catch their first football game in Winston-Salem and, as it happened, we saw the first ranked Wake Forest team play at home since 1979. Kyle Orton and his highly regraded Purdue team were in town and Wake had a chance to win in the final minute, but four straight runs up the middle from the three-yard line stuffed the Deacs chances.
3) Drinking at a tailgate before the upstart Maryland Terrapins rolled into town, I was cited by an Alcohol Law Enforcement Officer for underage drinking and ended up missing the game entirely. It was the first game played post 9/11 and, in the midst of trying to talk my way out of the citation, I mentioned that if the ALE give me a ticket then the terrorists had won, but that fell on deaf ears. The kicker was that that tool crept up on me during my first sip of the morning. Shoot, if I'm gonna get cited, I at least want to deserve it, you know?
2) While wearing my "Yankees Suck/Jeter Swallows" shirt (that I always said was only acceptable for display at tailgates), I worked the parking lot with my friend Caroline, looking for free food and beverage. Stumbling upon one law school tailgate where the Bojangles was flowing, I was told by someone that there would be unlimited chicken in it for me if I showed my shirt to a short girl wearing an attractive sundress. I did and during her play of mock anger somebody jokingly yelled "punch him, DiMaggio!" It turns out the girl was Joe DiMaggio's great-niece, a Wake Forest law student. We ended up eating chicken and drinking together for a while and took some pictures that are, unfortuntately, now lost to the ages.
1b) Before this season, Wake's greatest football moment in 20 years was an end-of-season upset of #14 Georgia Tech in 1999, a win which made the Deacs bowl-eligible (they'd go on to win the Aloha Bowl). After the game, Wake students tore down the goalposts and carried them down University Boulevard to the Quad. I missed most of this one because I was busy getting ready for a party held in our dorm that would eventually lead to two visits by police, a meeting with the Dean of Student Life (in which he repeatedly used the phrase "purple Jesus") and a temporary ban on freshman living on the upper-quad. Man, that was one sweet party.
1a) Perhaps the most underrated football moment in Wake school history was the 1999 Flag Football B-League Championship. Down six with three seconds left on the clock, Cardinal Gibbons star QB Brett Connolly threw a hail mary downfield that was caught by one Nicholas "The Wolfman" Streit in the endzone. Throughout his life, The Wolfman always said he could of played D-III if he had wanted. After that catch, I know for sure he could have at least played D-II.

In lieu of another preview that sounds exactly like the other ones I've written this year, I decided to ask my buddy Scott for this thoughts on tomorrow's game. As usual, he doesn't disappoint:

hey hey, man game day cant get here quick enough, but at the same time i wish it would hang around for a while longer b/c its sweet to have something this good to look forward to. Oh well, no reason not to expect a similar season next year. So let's bring it on, I"m ready to head up the mtns. to watch it with some special beers i brewed that are actually tasty. No Jax for me, which seemed crazy a couple weeks ago, but after catching 3 home games and 2 road ones this year, I'm not trying to go back to back 6 hour drives. And the lady friend didn't really want to do the trip in her first week in CLT. After telling her how crazy and once in a lifetime this may be, she was OK to go, but we had already made plans a few weeks ago, and I'm excited about it.

I don't know so much about the ramblin wreck, but from what i can gather they've got a pretty good D. And of course you've got Calvin. Wake has a pretty good secondary, and we will miss our safeties next year, even though I like our young'uns Vaughn and little Ghee. Patterson and Swanson, mainly Swanson, will be pretty good guarding Calvin, but they may be just too dang short ala the FSU game last year when Carr killed us. Of course the biggest factor in deciding who wins thins game is which Reggie Ball shows up. The Deacs can play great ball with few turnovers and penalties, but if reggie ball is going crazy they aren't going to win.

But I don't see the Deac's D is going to let that happen, and who are we kidding, do you really think Ball isn't going to pee the bed? I look for our linebackers to help kill the running game and grab at least one pick, and I see Curry with at least 1 sack and Abbatte with about 13 tackles and a safety. Of course Gattis will get his weekly grab, and will pencil in Alphonso Smith to continue his second half return to freshman form, having a big second half just blitzing the crap out of Ball.

Hard to believe the O can play as good as they did last week, but I think the D can give us a little more room. I love Riley, but really, that kid is putting up way too high of a completion %, albeit on few passs, and far to few INTs. I'm hoping for just some dropped balls, but I'm guessing we'll see a pick too. If for some dumb reason they have Skinner as the #2 next year, they need to start him at fullback because he can block like crazy. I'd like to see for a Morton TD pass, or at least an attempt. I hope I get to scream Kenny! as much as last week, but I don't see him getting nearly as many rushing yards Sat but hope to see him line up as a reciever some-probalby not going to happen though. We should see some good ole fashioned White Lightnin with Kevin Harris in a good day. Wake fans say your prayers for an afternoon of Deangelo and Travo on the bench all freaking game. I think that Kevin Marion will make some plays and Morton will catch some important balls

Willie run a freaking punt back like its '02! Special teams not looking good for the Deacs, other than and kicking that is. Actually, I think the Deacs get a block here, yes that's a block, a safety, and a TD pass from the WR. A man can dream right.

Well I won't dream too much, 31-22 Bees

And that is way too long

Go Deacs. This is a truly remarkable day.

Week 13 NFL Picks: New England, Buffalo, Washington, Indianapolis, St. Louis, New Orelans, New York Jets, Kansas City, Chicago, Oakland, Miami, Pittsburgh, New York Giants, Denver